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A Chronically Ill Spouse

When your spouse is chronically ill, it affects you, too, in so many ways. Most of us notice this spillover effect. Your life gets harder -- running more errands, doing more chores, coordinating health care, insuring a steady income, and limitations on travel and the strenuousness of what you can do together.

It's not an easy life, but it feels awful to complain, because no matter how bad it gets, you know yours is easier than your spouse's.

But there is a spillover effect in the other direction, too. Make sure you don't lose it by spending all your time and money on making life easier for your ill spouse. Dedicate some to doing things that bring you the joy of wellness. It spills over, too.

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Patty Newbold is a widow who got it right the second time...

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