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Five Ways to Screw Up a Holiday

Here are five great ways to screw up a family holiday:


  • Overschedule yourselves, leaving no time to savor together the family gathering you worked so hard to create

  • Fail to notice your mate's Love Language, whether it's bringing something extra from the store as a gift, obsessing over the turkey as an act of service, or spending precious bonus time off from work trying to talk or do something together with you

  • Share your displeasure over the way things are going with what marriage researchers call a harsh startup, instead of first asking gently for whatever you would prefer

  • Agree to one thing (like gathering with your extended family) and do another (like watch football in the den while your mate cooks and your guests stew)

  • Take your spouse to visit your family and forget to create a few moments for just the two of you


Know how I know? I've lived every one of them. Here's to a great Thanksgiving this year.

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Patty Newbold is a widow who got it right the second time...

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