Five Questions to Help You Find 3rd Alternatives
You want something. Your spouse objects, because he or she wants something else in the same time slot, with the same money, or in the same spot. You need a Third Alternative.
You want what you want, and you want to be the sort of spouse who gives your mate what he or she wants, too. But what you each want is seldom the thing you each say you want. It is the feelings and the capabilities that thing offers you. And there are many ways to get what it offers you.
Question 1: What results would our Third Alternative need to provide to make both of us happy?
Question 2: What disadvantages would our Third Alternative need to avoid to make both of us happy?
Question 3: What stands in the way of having this AND that instead of this OR that?
Question 4: What are we taking for granted about our options that does not really matter to either of us?
Question 5: Who do we know that might have looked for something similar in the past and run across ideas we have not heard of yet?
A Third Alternative gets you what you want and lets you give generously to your life partner at the same time. If you are looking for one right now, please use the comments as your way to reach out to thousands of other people for help finding it.