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Fighting for Your Marriage

I strongly recommend Fighting for Your Marriage by Howard J. Markman, Scott M. Stanley, and Susan L. Blumberg. A new and revised version was published in 2001 by Jossey-Bass.

Assume Love can be the first step on the road to a happier marriage, but it should not be the last step. The PREP program taught in this book can improve your marriage even more. PREP stands for Prevention and Relationship Enhancement. The course benefits both engaged couples and those seeking a better marriage.

They list four hallmarks of a great relationship:

  1. Be safe at home.
  2. Open the doors to initimacy.
  3. Do your part and be responsible.
  4. Nurture security in your future together.

PREP, a well-researched program, works best for couples who can do the exercises together. If your spouse isn't yet ready to work with you on the marriage, you'll find some useful ideas that you can use on your own. Just remember not to add Markman, Stanley, and Blumberg's advice to your list of things your spouse "should" do. That would erode, rather than help, your marriage.

Fighting for Your Marriage. Howard J. Markman, Scott M. Stanley, and Susan L. Blumberg. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 2001. 374 pages.

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Patty Newbold is a widow who got it right the second time...

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