In today's Seattle Times, marriage advice from seven siblings, all of whom have been married to the same husband or wife for fifty years.

• Faith


• Eat together


• A lot of give and take


• Family time


• Stay in touch with close relatives


• Humor


• Good cooking


• Accept each other's idiosyncrasies

Posted by patty at 11:49 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

White House Press Secretary Dana Perino says her predecessor, Tony Snow, "was the inspiration for her 2008 New Year's resolution, which was always to take her husband's telephone calls, no matter how busy she was at work," according to tomorrow's New York Times.

Tony Snow died today of colon cancer, at age 53, leaving a wife and three children it's evident he cared for deeply, and some great advice for all of us.

Posted by patty at 1:01 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I've always thought it wonderful that when I married, I married into a family. Both my husbands' families are now part of my extended family. When my son married eight years ago, my family grew again. In a couple of weeks, I'll get to meet his mother-in-law and father-in-law, who live in India, in person for the first time. I can't wait. We share a couple of adorable grandkids who stand at the ready to translate for us.

When people marry expecting they'll divorce if it doesn't work out, I always wonder how they can be so cavalier about the rest of their extended family. Some manage to stay connected to their new family after divorce, but not many. My life would seem so much smaller without my California-Florida-Pennsylvania-Ohio-Texas-Ontario-Saudi Arabia-India family arms. They are a wonderful part of being married.

Posted by patty at 1:23 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

My article,
My Spouse Acts Like He (She) Hates Me!
When You No Longer Feel Loved,
in the Summer issue of Going Bonkers? The self-help magazine with a sense of humor, will be in bookstores on July 3rd.

Which bookstores? Barnes & Noble, Borders, Books-a-Million, Hastings Books, and independent bookstores like Doylestown Bookshop. Some outlets may not carry the magazine, and some may run out, so please ask a sales clerk if you have any trouble locating a copy.

It looks like a really great issue, with 29 feature articles on relationships, motivation, personality disorders, getting unstuck, and more, plus lots of shorter pieces and cartoons. Mine is the lead article on the cover, in case you want to look for it.

Posted by patty at 11:02 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I will be attending a bridal shower tomorrow for an arranged marriage between two Muslims, and I wish both of them the very best, lifelong marriage.

So I was thrilled to receive a Google alert this morning about an excellent article in Pakistan Daily about preparing for a Muslim marriage.

For those of us who are not Muslims, it may seem remarkable that Muslim Americans, many or most of whom marry people they've never dated and didn't fall in love with before the wedding, and who don't consider staying marriage a religious requirement, have a lower than average divorce rate of 33%.

Whether you practice Islam or not, the article makes some very good points about preparing for marriage and not just the wedding.

I learned the divorce rate is slightly lower for Muslim Americans, but still a discouraging 33%. The author offers some good advice about preparing to remain in the other two-thirds.

Posted by patty at 11:38 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)